


Night of Repentance

by CrazyNekoChan



Series: Days of Despair [5]
Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-23
Updated: 2018-02-23
Packaged: 2019-03-23 00:06:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13775481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrazyNekoChan/pseuds/CrazyNekoChan
Summary: The memories of what has happened inside of the Neo World Program and how he had ultimately lost his life due to his own sins, became too much for Gundham that night.





	Night of Repentance

**Author's Note:**

> I had this idea at work and I wanted to write a vulnerable Gundham, so enjoy

His eyes were fixed onto his approaching doom with determination, awaiting the final moments of his cursed life. Yet despite of starting all of this with the knowledge that it would end his life, he felt this despairing fear nested in the deepest part of his dark soul. Before he was able to brace himself for his inescapable demise, the wild horde of hellish beasts collided with his body, stomping him into the cold, hard ground beneath their feet, until he was covered in his own blood and his bones were broken and crushed underneath their weight. The Overlord of Ice was in such an excruciating pain, unlike anything he has ever felt before. Never in his unholy life did he ever feel this week and broken.

The last thing he saw were the sad faces of his trusted Four Dark Devas of Destruction, before everything slowly went cold and dark and he gave his last dying breath. However the agonizing pain still resided inside of his beaten and bloody mortal form, just as the empty stares of his allies who he had betrayed with his sin.

 

Gundham's body jolted awake and he was back inside of his bedroom, away from that cursed placed inside of the fake realm, where he had once found his end. His mortal form had been covered in sweat and was shivering uncontrollably with the memory of his punishment. The moon and stars were still shining up in the dark sky and his consort was sleeping peacefully next to him, as he did every night.

To not disturb his beloved in his slumber, Gundham got out of their shared bed on shaking legs. He could not be responsible of waking the other because of the unforgivable sins that he had committed. It was him who has taken the life of his ally and it did not matter that the Trainer of Warriors was also willing to fight to their death, nor that they have done it to save the other mortals from the dreadful fate of starvation or that Gundham was executed for it in the very end. He had done so many unforgivable things inside of the Neo World Program and in the real world as a Remanent of Despair and for this he had to live with the ever recurring nightly terrors for the rest of his life.

 

Gundham's eyes scanned the dark room. There were not many places where he could be alone, as he and his allies were currently living inside of the small cottages on the real Jabberwock Island, meaning if he left the cottage he could cross paths with the other mortals, if they also happen to be awake; which happened quite often after all that has happened to them. So instead Gundham made his way towards the bathroom on weak legs that could hardly hold his weight at this moment. Turning the lights on, he slumped onto the floor as his legs have finally given up with supporting him. His whole form was shivering and he was frightened about what he had done with his own two hands. The guilt of all the lives he had taken and the sadness of having lost nearly everything he once held dear in his life was crushing him and he deserved it, as these were his sins to carry.

 

***

 

Something was moving on top of Kazuichi's body and thus woke him up from his sleep. Opening his tired eyes, he could hardly see what had woken him up in the darkness, especially without his glasses or contact lenses. However he was able to tell that it was one of Gundham's many hamsters after he felt the familiar soft fur move against the exposed skin of his arm.

“Go back to yar nest, I wanna sleep.” Kazuichi mumbled tiredly and turned around to cuddle back into the comfortable warmth of his lover's body. However there was nothing next to him in the bed, only empty sheets. “Hmm? Gundham?” Kazuichi sat up and turned the small light next to the bed on, while grabbing his glasses and putting them on his face to clear his vision. The bed was empty besides of him and now there were even more hamsters sitting on the bed, who all seemed to be alert about something.

Some of the hamsters were squeaking quite loudly, while others seemed to run around wildly. “What's wrong and where's Gundham?” he asked confused and tried to rub the lingering tiredness out of his eyes. At the question, all of the hamsters quickly climbed off the bed and ran towards a small patch of light, that was shining out from the slightly ajar door leading to his and Gundham's bathroom.

 

That was weird. The usually well-trained hamsters were behaving really strangely and while Kazuichi and Gundham were used to seeing the other inside of the bathroom after being a couple for many years now, both of them still tended to pull the door fully closed while being inside. Just to make sure that everything was alright, Kazuichi got up and went towards the bathroom door, pushing it open slowly. “Gundham, are ya in there?”

When he carefully opened the door, Kazuichi's eyes widened with shock. There on the floor he saw Gundham cowering and shivering with his whole body. “Gundham!” Kazuichi ran into the bathroom and kneeled down next to the other, “What's wrong? Are ya in pain?”

To Kazuichi's worry the other was looking away from him and he didn't turn towards Kazuichi at all. “I am not in pain, there is no need for worry my paramour.” Gundham answered with a wobbly and weak voice.

“Gundham, please look at me.” Kazuichi said with a soft voice and gently took Gundham's face into his hands and made him look at Kazuichi. Just as he did suspect after hearing the other's voice, he saw that Gundham was crying. “What is wrong?” he asked and carefully began wiping the shed tears from his lover's face.

Gundham let Kazuichi take care of him, however he let his head fall slightly. Whatever has happened, it must have been terrible for Gundham to react in such a way. It was a rare occurrence that Gundham cried over anything.

After a few moments of silence, Gundham began explaining. “I was having dreams about the punishment that I have received inside of that cursed program.”

Now Kazuichi understood fully. When he saw how Gundham was killed in such a cruel way, he was disturbed and the images haunted him, making him wish to forget them forever. However this was nothing against what it has done to Gundham, who was forced to see how his beloved animal ran up towards him to kill him and he had to feel the pain of death; a thing no person should ever have to experience. The memory must be scarring for him.

Kazuichi gently put his arms around Gundham and hugged him, petting his lover's hair. “It's over now. We are safe and nothing can harm us any more. I'm there for ya Gundham, so just let it out. There's no one here to watch and judge ya. You are safe, so ya can cry if you want.”

At hearing these words, Gundham leaned heavily against Kazuichi's body and began crying into the other's chest, while he was being held by him. This was the first time that Gundham let himself feel vulnerable and actually cry after waking up from his coma. It was long overdue and Kazuichi had been starting to get more worried each day about his lover not letting his sadness and regret out, like all the others on the island did at some point. While Gundham was finally letting his bottled up emotions out, Kazuichi kept on holding him and was gently petting the other's hair, while reassuring him with a soft voice, like Gundham normally did for him.

 

After a while Gundham was slowly beginning to calm down again. However he kept on leaning against Kazuichi to feel just a little bit safer.

“I am sorry for being so weak...” Gundham mumbled into the fabric of his lover's shirt.

“Weak?” Kazuichi gently lifted his lover's face again. Gundham could sometimes be such an idiot. “Ya aren't week for crying over something like this, everybody does. It's normal, so ya can cry about it as much as ya want and ya don't have to do it alone. Ya can always come to me, because that's what a boyfriend is there for and ya can believe me when I say that ya will feel better after crying on somebodies shoulder. I'm mean, I should know.”

“But I am the dark lord, I should not show such weakness.” Gundham replied, his voice still a little raw after crying so much.

“Gundham, I love ya very much and ya know that, but that was just the most stupidest thing that ya said in a long time.” Kazuichi kept on hugging the other, however Gundham needed to get the truth that he was allowed to feel sad into his thick skull, “As I said, I cry all the time over the silliest things and ya still call me your dark consort. So why would I be allowed to cry like any normal person would, but not the dark lord himself? And before ya come up with a stupid answer, there is no reason. So even you, the dark lord and master of the four Devas, are allowed to cry from time to time.”

“While you are right with your statement, it does not change the mistakes that I have done and I have to carry the weight of my sins...” So this was also what this was about.

“Now listen Gundham. I already told ya once when ya woke up and I will gladly tell ya as often as it takes. We both did all that shit together, so we both should carry the blame. So stop beating yourself up about it and let us atone for everything together, okay?” he gently kissed his lover, showing him that he was there no matter what happened. It was both of them that fell into despair because of that blond bitch and not just Gundham, so there was no way in hell that Kazuichi would let his lover feel any more despair because of the things that she made them do. This all was behind them now and all of them were working together to undo their terrible mistakes as much as they could.

Gundham kissed him back and while Kazuichi wasn't sure if his lover only did it out of reflex or because he genuinely began to feel better, Kazuichi was at least glad that Gundham was beginning to respond more to him.

“You are right my paramour. I have been foolish of thinking that I have to do this on my own.”

Finally Gundham was returning to his usual self after having broken down for the first time, which made Kazuichi glad to see. Getting up to his feet, he took Gundham's hands into his own and helped him stand up. “Let's go to bed now and cuddle.”

 

Kazuichi kept holding Gundham's hand and went back into the main room of their shared cottage, getting both a new shirt to wear as their current ones were now damp with tears. Helping Gundham getting changed, Kazuichi then climbed into the bed with him and pulled him against his body, holding Gundham in his arms. The still tense muscles of the bigger male were slowly relaxing again, now that he was in the warm bed and was held by his lover.

“While I do not wish to sleep, at least you should rest my consort. There is no reason for the both of us to stay awake in this endless night and I do not wish for you to feel exhaustion on my behalf.” Gundham suggested and had his head resting on Kazuichi's chest, listening to his lover's steady heartbeat.

“Oh don't worry Hamster-chan. You know better than anyone how long I can stay awake at night.” Kazuichi grinned to reassure the other. He didn't mind staying awake with Gundham.

“Are we still talking about the same topic now?” To Kazuichi amazement and relieve, Gundham had to give the smallest chuckle at the unintended innuendo of his lover's last sentence.

“Ah, that came out wrong!” Kazuichi blushed at this, but also had to give the tiniest laugh. And everybody always thought that it was Kazuichi who constantly had his head in the gutter. Though Gundham's way of thinking nowadays could be a little side effect of spending so much time with the slightly perverted mechanic.

However as long as Gundham was beginning to get into a better mood again, Kazuichi didn't mind this small embarrassment.

After this the two lovers fell into a comfortable silence and Kazuichi kept on petting his lover's hair, like said male liked to do to him, and it made Gundham hum in content.

 

In the end, Gundham was able to fall asleep again without being disturbed by nightmares of his terrible past. However Kazuichi stayed awake, because Gundham had been wrong. There was a reason to stay awake and it was a really good one in his own opinion. It may still take a lot of time until Gundham would be able to overcome his trauma, however he did at least finally began to acknowledge his feelings and was letting them out, instead of burying them deep inside of himself until they could destroy him. And if this improvement meant that Kazuichi wouldn't get any sleep that night just to make sure that he could stop any nightmare of Gundham, he would be willing to do it.


End file.
